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  1. Woman fined for kissing painting

    The 'priceless’ painting in question was a blank white canvas! If the artist isnt able to do another one then perhaps I could oblige for a…

  2. Presley regains rich list crown

    According to the BBC, "Elvis Presley is the highest-earning dead celebrity, with an annual income of $49m (£23.7m), a US survey…

  3. Stephen Fry & Hugh Laurie Play 'Light Metal'

    Finding the story about Brother Cesare, the heavy metal monk, reminded me of this sketch with Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie. I give you "The Bishop and the Warlord".

  4. Dog-snatchers!

    Worrying reports of dog-snatchers in the area...

  5. Warhol’s Liz Taylor set for sale

    This is another reason for Hugh Grant’s many female(and I suppose male!) fans to get excited as he apparently owns the picture. It is a rather…

  6. Never quite made it…

    The Russian space shuttle Buran (Snowstorm) now languishing on a scrapheap in Bahrain - the programme was canceled after the collapse of the USSR.

  7. Mum of the Year?…

    'I only meant to hire a gorilla!'

  8. One cool dude!

    Not quite what you might expect when sitting minding your own business having a quiet cup of coffee first thing in the morning.

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  1. In Dog-snatchers!, nikkie said:

    “well sorry but i think that`s realy cruel dogs arnt meant for…”

  2. In Man is found glued to toilet seat, nikkie said:

    “Im realy sorry but how the hell did he get stuck to the flipping…”

  3. In Rick Astley shortlisted for MTV award!, RW said:

    “But would you prefer to have another go now or try and bop to some…”

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  1. Welcome!

    “Well, here we are! Today we open our doors and welcome in our first members to Complete Twit. So, what’s it all about? Do you find yourself…”

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